Frustration With The Job Search

How am I supposed to show enthusiasm for every job I apply to if I am losing optimism in all my efforts? I have written so many cover letters. Long and short. Showing my excitement, maybe showing too much excitement. There are the sites that only allow one cover letter even if you are applying to multiple similar jobs with different requirements.  A company has contacted me! I figured they must have seen something they like. I tried not to get my hopes up and send what they ask. One week, no reply. Send nice follow up letter. One more week, “we went in a different direction”. Friends have sent me job applications, still turned down. Then there are the companies that don’t get back to you not even with a generic email to say you suck. (I understand why they don’t send emails).  And worst the companies that will give you a job but only if they don’t have to pay you. Would you like to build up your resume with our internship? How about a few more articles? We have over a million readers coming to our site daily. Don’t forget to flood your social feeds with your articles and did you ask you friends to like our page.

Tomorrow I’ll be fine. Write new cover letters, sent out a few more resumes, and maybe write a few 100 words towards a story. Today is the day to let out the frustration.

Unemployed Rant

March 13, 2012

I am unemployed. My “free” time is looking and applying to jobs. I have projects I am working on but they are not producing money just yet. I hope this blog doesn’t put me or others in a poor light but just because I’m unemployed doesn’t mean you can take advantage of my time.

I guess most people have the image of an unemployed person sitting in their parents house, watching TV or playing video games and doing nothing not trying to benefit themselves. Unemployment is seen by some to be a wanted life of not having to do anything and not having go to the office from 9-5 and deal with whatever it is you hate dealing with at work.

So people are kind and will offer me a job to help them out in their business. First these people never give you a properly figured out time schedule. It will always only take one day or a few. They make it sound like this is a job you are helping them with when in the end you are doing it by yourself. They always tell you while you are doing the job how much they didn’t want to do it so they waited till last minute and than gave the job to you. If it happens to take more then the one day (which it does) they can string you along. Whether they intend to or not is never clear but I do believe one thing, because you are unemployed they think you need this and will wait for them to be ready.

Now I am frustrated. I worked one day on a tedious project. I thought it was me helping this woman. I worked on the project alone. I didn’t realize how big the project was going to be. I worked the whole day. I only took a break to eat. I didn’t waste time smart phoning. At the end of the day I was no where near finishing this project. I waited days being told they had more important things to take care of so the project was off. Weather got bad so no project. Months have gone by and this person called yesterday. I was busy so I didn’t get a chance to call her back. They called again this morning. I guess what else do I have to do since I’m out of work but jump when they say so.

Before you think I’m whining and tell me:

this person is trying to “helped” you
they could really use the help
It’s some extra cash for you
It should only take a few days what else are you doing

I don’t agree. Maybe it’s best you stop reading.

Worst is friends will try and make it sound like you should be thankful. I don’t need to be congratulated because I’m getting payed or helping out someone. I don’t need you to be excited for me or cheer me up when I try to explain to them my frustration.

Maybe I did make a mistake majoring in a subject I am passionate about, a subject I enjoy. I should have majored in a subject that would guarantee a job. I should have struggled and hated a career just because it paid well.

Most think I should have become a nurse like Mom. It pays and has great benefits. Yes, I could have became a nurse, doctor or assistant but don’t you feel the problem with the medical profession is most people never wanted that profession in the first place. Don’t you see and feel when you walk into a doctor’s office the assistant who could really care less about how you feel. The clinic that just moves you alone to just get you out. The elderly hospital that leaves someone in a wet bed because it’s not their job to clean them. That’s a human being! That could be you mother or father! I’ve seen people not help someone to the bathroom because that was not there job. Really?! That person is just asking for a helping hand. But no, they will get the nurse.

Maybe I should have stayed in my dead end retail job with no health care benefits, poor pay, or appreciation just because it was a job. I did love hearing everyday customer’s insults and put downs because I was a “dumb” cashier. Yes, I was a cashier but that doesn’t mean I’m not educated.

It is a bad economy but I don’t think that gives anyone the right to take advance of others. People should be more considerate. I hate talking about the economy, hearing advice about job searching and I hate how I should have went into this or have I thought about that.

I paid my way through college. I have no loans. You picked and payed for your child’s college so they graduate with a job. You gave them a car. They still get in trouble and their grades drop. I think I am more than capable of getting any job. I’m looking for something more filling. But thanks for helping me waste my time.

Sorry for the vent.


Job Searching

March 12, 2012

To bad there isn’t a box I can check stating, Scared to Death. It would forgive any mistakes I made in the cover letter after I send it out. I know from experience one mistake can prevent you from getting a job. I kicked myself when I didn’t send a follow up saying, “I did see I made this mistake after I sent it.” But company probably would have still told me to bad. Maybe do better next time. Wish I sent a cover letter with a resume recently to a job in Georgia. Guess I don’t have to worry about moving.

Scared to death because it has been so long since I’ve had a job, I wonder if I even know if I’m going in the right direction. Scared to death because I’m tired of the 9-5 grind in a dull office with no or so few windows that look out at another gray building. Tired of working my ass off and getting nothing because I didn’t participate in the employee ass kissing contest so I’m ignored.

Wish I could be some genus and think of some great idea and I could be the boss or co-boss of. Don’t have the mind for it. To fearful. Wish I could stop searching, stop worrying, and just be happy.

Independent Projects

September 22, 2011
Working on so much. Writing for sites I have a foot in, sites I don’t have much in except the work I put in for them and sites I will have my whole brain in but nothing paying. Enterprising is a poor business.

So I am trying my best to learn about shoe fashion. Find the trends and write about them. If I was only more knowledgeable on fashion now. I can do celebrity writing. Some news days are better than others. Most days are the same. The most fun I have is interviewing but I am growing tired of working for free.

Trying to research the bones of a new site. Don’t know if I should say what that site will be just yet. Don’t want to jinks anything. I need it to happen. If no one will hire me then I need to be a part of the makings of another business.

Still searching and applying for a job. Double time. It is a constant struggle. One day the economy is better the next day it’s worst. Applying is always the same.


When It Rains

March 13, 2011
Searching for jobs is a specialty of mine. I have it down to an organized system. It looks like all that hard work has paid off. I have had one interview at a publishing house for an internship. Part time, possible hire at the end of three months. It looks very hopeful if I work my butt off and I can and will work my butt off. I will also be able to check a dream off my list. I have always wanted to work in a publishing house.

What I find funny is the day before I was excepted into the position I scheduled a phone interview with another company. This was a full-time proofreading position. I still took the interview. Think I did well. Then checked my e-mail to have another phone interview to schedule but that would be a move to West Virgina.

I write this because I find it amusing. Working so hard and applying to so many jobs and then it is, three in almost one week. I laughed. I’m also writing this for others who are looking and frustrated. There is a silver lining.

Freelance Career

March 4, 2011
I envy my friends who work freelance careers. I am still out of work, not for a lack of trying, and I would love to start writing freelance articles. It would be nice to make my own hours, be my own boss, and write different topics. Not sit in an office surfing the web because you finished all the work assigned.

So, what is holding me back? My friends who work their own freelance business have customers come to them and tell them what they (the costumers) want. Yes, they are established in their careers but they are also in careers that seem to need a customers input.

As a writer I am suppose to be full of ideas and pitch these original ideas to experts and editors at magazines and websites. I have written for other websites in my past internships. One was celebrity news and the other was mostly culinary, which as an editor I wrote mostly restaurant openings, recipes, and upcoming TV/food news. I remember the articles I had the most fun researching and writing. My interviews with Thomas Jane, John Debney, and Bokeem Woodbine or my Top Gear article. (Loved talking to people, being out of the office, and taking pictures. It is what I thought the life was about.)

The point is I’m not full ideas. Even this blog can be a struggle. I can research and write articles. There are many book about freelancing and not one covers where a writer can find topics to write about.

Where do freelance writers find their ideas?


This Time With Feeling

February 18, 2011
I have been told by others my best postings are the ones with feeling. My best topics with emotion are the ones about something personal (i.e. the job searching post).

Silly me, I thought I was putting my love into each topic I wrote. I do care about what I post. My postings are structured. I check for spelling and grammar errors. All I know is that I have only just started and I have obstacle s.

How do I add feelings/emotions/love to all my writing?

Is that why I’m having trouble finding a job? Not enough passion showing through?

Passion… I know I am held back by fear but do I have passion?